Training Camp

I always wanted to be a dog trainer. Dogs are great. They love you unconditionally, always miss you when you leave and show their undying affection when you return, and are the most empathetic pet. Dogs are cuddly and cute and wonderful. Yes, I am a dog person. In fact, if I could manage a successful, profitable doggy daycare I would be stocking up on pooper scoopers before you could utter the words "doggy biscuit". I much prefer doggy doo-doo to big kid poop and dog slobber doesn't seem to have the same cringe factor as snotty, kid spit. And heck, just like kids, dogs can be trained too. God love 'em.

I've never met a dog I didn't like. I can't say the same for kids. Yes, I will openly admit that I don't like all kids. Kids who are misbehaved, rude and impolite can try their repertoire on someone else cause this old gal ain't buying it. However, I think most of the harder-to-like kids lack the same things that hard-to-like dogs lack - training. Really, give me any dog that is unruly and disliked and in a weeks' time, with some love, attention and training that dog will morph into the most pleasant pet you ever had the fortune to call your own. The same can be said for children. With a little love and guidance and the ability to be the bad guy, any caregiver can have wonderful children to spend her days with.

My brother in law always joked that when he had kids he was going to send them to me to raise for a few weeks. He had no doubt that whatever troubles they had when dropped off would somehow disappear during their stay with me. We never carried out this experiment but I suspect his hunch is correct. Kids respect me not because I am mean or controlling. Kids respect me because they understand that I have high expectations for them. I expect nothing less than their best and for that expectation I gain respect and behaved children.

There was a day last week when I realized the extent of my efforts to help raise caring, responsible children. It is a rule of mine that while the children are in my care they will clean up their mess of toys. You will not find me on my hands and knees digging Little People out from under the doll cradle or Lego from under the craft table. No, those who make the mess shall clean up after themselves. Their mothers might tidy up their toys at home but this is not home. This is Miss Judy's house. This rule came to a head when a new child, who has been in my care a mere three weeks awoke from nap time. As I smiled and asked everyone how their sleep was I was gathering pillows and placing them away until their next use. From across the room came this new child, nap mat, pillow and blanket in hand to put them in the cupboard. I did not ask him to carry these large, bulky items. He simply felt the initiative to do so and took responsibility for his things. It was a proud moment. In three weeks time he had figured it out and a difference was made.

Children can be trained. The word training in concern to children often has a negative connotation. I'm not sure why this is. As adults we receive training in all types of environments. We are trained in school, in our jobs, and in some cases, parenting. We are trained and we learn as a result. Children deserve the opportunity to train as well. Why do we often rob them of this ability? We rob them because we assume they are not capable. What a shame to underestimate the abilities of children.

It amazes me that many parents do not give training its merit due. They think their child too young to learn. They see a child manipulate a negative situation but do not have the insight to realize that manipulation takes tremendous thought and intelligence. If your child is adept at manipulating you to pick up his toys for him then he possesses the competence to do it himself.

I wish that as a society we would stop coddling our children keeping them in a perpetual state of infancy. Perhaps this attempt to keep our children dependent is self-serving and fills a void that we find empty. Regardless, that is our problem and not that of the child. We need to start treating children like people; clever, intelligent, equipped people. People who have the desire and ability to learn and grow and acquire new skills; people who deserve nothing less.

My sleep time security share is coming to an end. In a few minutes I will greet my nappers with a smile and pat on the head. And when I do, every one of them will pick up their sleep mat and pillow and hand them to me to put in the cupboard. I wish their parents were here to witness this. They might be amazed at the skills their child possesses - all in the name of training.