Kids Are Sociopaths

The title says it all. This week a study was released by Dr. Leonard Mateo of the University of Minnesota stating that children under the age of ten are "remorseless sociopaths". I couldn't agree more. As I write this I can already see the masses of parents everywhere shaking their heads and rolling their eyes and cursing Dr. Mateo to an early death. I tend to think he deserves a lot of credit for stating, albeit the obvious to those who work with children, the truth about those we deem to be most innocent. Children are not innocent. Naive, immature, and irrational, yes. But innocent - not in a million years.

Quoting from the words of Dr. Mateo:

"....most adults are completely unaware that they could be living among callous monsters who would remorselessly exploit them to obtain something as insignificant as an ice cream cone or a new toy."

Hmmm...really? Because I have been saying that all along. Where is my published piece in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry? Oh yeah, I guess one must attend post graduate studies for half their adult life to claim to know those truths.

I think it pertinent to first understand the word sociopath. The clinical definition states: Individuals with this disorder have little regard for the feeling and welfare of others. Sounds familiar, doesn't it? I'm pretty sure little Johnny wasn't considering the welfare of his friend Sally this summer when he hit her on the head with the sand pail. And I'm also certain Johnny didn't care that Tommy would get hurt when he pushed him down and stole his Duplo. Yep, that proves it - Johnny's a sociopath.

If the study was worthy then fifty percent of the children in my care are future Ted Bundys and Marilyn Mansons. They certainly exhibit all of those traits and attributes of known and defined sociopathy. I guess I better think about something akin to the witness protection plan by the time Johnny reaches eighteen. No doubt he will harbour resentment toward me his entire sociopathic life for making him clean up the play room and sit in the crying corner for accosting his friends.

My favourite quote from the study was, "sociopaths often display superficial charm, pathological lying, manipulative behaviors, and a grandiose sense of self-importance. After observing 700 children engaged in everyday activities, Mateo and his colleagues found that 684 exhibited these behaviors at a severe or profound level." This quote struck me quite profoundly because I have had a child in my care quite like this. I'm sure you have too. You know the one - the child who refuses to play but would rather watch because she deems herself to "good" to interact with the likes of others. This same child will shoot you a chilling stare of snarling proclivity. She knows she's got you over a barrel and short of beating her with a stick there is nothing you can do to force her to interact or comply to the daily routine. At pick-up time this child turns into a complete demonic monster upon the arrival of her parents. She smuggly smiles at you with a message of 'check mate'. It takes every fibre of restraint you can muster not to lose your cool and do something that would warrant a visit by the authorities.

The situations Dr. Mateo cites most definitely occur. I agree there are children who exhibit these characteristics. But the argument that exists is are these children really sociopathic or are they simply the product of poor parenting practices? I believe they are the latter. I have often had children in my care who are pleasant, well behaved children from the time their parents exit until the moment they reappear. These children are wonderful for me but little devils for their parents. Unless these children possess dual personalities that are time delayed to occur at exactly 7:30 am and 4:30pm I will argue that it is parenting that accounts for their change in demeanour and not a psychiatric state.

Dr. Mateo is half correct. I do believe we all have the ability and the innate tendency to be selfish monsters with no regard for others. It is in our genes. We are, after all, merely animals like those of nature. We are arrogant to think a few thousand years of domesticity can change our DNA and all of our thought processes. However, from an early age we can be moulded to think otherwise and understand that our desires are often harmful to others. We can not afford, as a society to be selfish. Unfortunately, parents everywhere are dropping the ball. In short, we ARE raising sociopaths. We are creating them and we, as parents, need to accept our responsibility in that role. But we have a choice. It doesn't have to be that way.

I wish Dr. Mateo could pay me a visit one day. I would love for him to observe my suspected sociopath. I suspect, however, that he has more important things to do with his time. So for now, I'll just stick to plastic forks and hope she doesn't acquire the manual dexterity to whittle down Barbie doll legs into sharp, pointy objects. And in the mean time I'll try not to look into her demon eyes and I will check in to that witness protection program.



For concerns, advice or suggestions I welcome your email at judytrickett@yahoo.ca