Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Chopped Liver

Yes children; I know he's the fun guy. He makes you laugh. You love it when he peeks around the corner and sticks out his tongue and then disappears only to do it all over again a thousand more times. You giggle and laugh until your tummies hurt.

I also know that you hound him for cookies and snack cakes and little bits of breakfast bacon. And I also know that every single time he gives it to you. You know, I'm not ninety and I can hear you all whispering in collaboration with each other. I am aware of the conspiracy occurring right under my nose. You don't have to whisper - there is no real secret.

But have you ever noticed how he leaves the room when someone announces, "I smell something"? Have you ever seen him with a plastic bag, diaper and box of wipes, sleeved rolled up ready to take on Poop Master Mickey? No, I didn't think so. Or have you seen how quickly he can walk when shrill cries fill the room? Yes, that's him running away, far, far away while I run closer, closer, closer until I am in full contact with the snot ridden child who has cried himself hoarse.

I realize he is all things fun; a pony, a treat giver and a clown. I realize that he is more fun than an amusement park ride when he whirls you around in the air. Sadly, I have neither the strength or the time to play county fair roadie.

But it is me who is wiper of butts, dabber of noses, chef, maid, bottle washer, accountant, housekeeper and file clerk. Sure, he's fun but really, he's useless. He does not make this little daycare world you live in four days a week go round and round. Nope, that's me.

So please, children, cut me some slack. I'm tired and busy and have no time to be amusement park Tilt-A-Whirl or Ride-On-Pony. My back hurts from carrying the 50 pound 12 month old up and down the stairs and the oven is beeping at me. Can you give a gal a break?

I try to be fun, really I do. I could be more fun and if you want I too can try to spend my entire day making you laugh but there will be no lunch and Poop Master Mickey will be smelling up the entire room all day. I guess you get to choose.

Fun Guy is off to work now. Yes, children, sadly I am all that is left. Yep, the boring daycare lady who encourages you to eat your peas and makes you tidy up the playroom is all you have left to work with.

Now eat those peas, they're getting cold. Oh, and try using your fork.






or concerns, advice or suggestions I welcome your email at judytrickett@yahoo.ca
Posted by at 6:23 PM
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11 comments:

  1. Amen, sister!
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  2. It happens at home, too, trust me.
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  3. My kids love my hubby too! Especially the trick he does making the kids walk up his legs and then flips them around. I can do that too but only with the smallest of daycare kids! I'm just not strong enough!! My hubby has a pretty flexible job, he pops in throughout the day to do paperwork and the kids are thrilled when they see his truck arrive. Yesterday my two year old 'baddison' as we call her was so cute when my hubby got out of bed, came into the hallway to use the washroom and let out the biggest sneeze. She hollers 'Bless you Brett' and she can barely even speak english, the poor girl! It takes a special man to put up with our lifestyle and mine's been putting up with it for about ten years in total now! We've been married for almost 15 so two thirds of our marriage has involved other peoples kids taking over our space. He's also really good at making the kids listen when I have had it with them!
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  4. I would be a barrel of laughs too, if I knew I could rile them all up and then leave for the day. There are days when I am ready to say "Here, you got them going, now you deal with it - I'll go sit in your office all day and play on the computer." He had no idea how hard this really is. Then he wonders why I am so tired when I am making the 4th meal of the day, and then cleaning it up.....again.
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  5. LMAO!I can relate to this post. My dck's think that my hubby is the bee's knees (he is awesome, I can agree with that) but he leaves by 7:45am and then they have to deal with boring old me, and I'm just not willing to hoist them over my head and gorilla press them! hehehe
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  6. LMAO!!!! My hubby has been off work for 9mths and he too is the 'fun guy'. he pops in and out like a jack in the box through out the day...making the kids laugh, giving high fives and the occasional horsie ride. My little kidlets are going to go through some SERIOUS withdrawal in the next few weeks as he has found work and will not be here during the day as of Monday. Maybe then I can be the funny one again...probably not but there is always hope! lol
    dmansmommy
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  7. I must be the only one whose husband will stay clear of the daycare area until all children are gone...lol. Really, he doesn't interact with the kids hardly at all if he comes home when they're still here.

    Fruitloop
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  8. Can't say I blame him, Fruitloop!
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  9. Oodles of DoodlesJan 27, 2010 04:02 PM
    That's HILARIOUS!!! My hubby is the exact same way. He drives me NUTS when he gives them all the WORST snacks EVER, while I'm cleaning something gross up, letting them in my good upstairs living room to wipe their filthy hands ALL over my PLASMA. BUGGER. LOL
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  10. My hubby barely interacts with the dcks.He will call from the shop and ask if it is safe yet!! :)

    Somedays he tries,but really,I think I like the fact that he cant handle other peoples kids. At least that way he isnt winding them all up! :)
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  11. my dh has a very deep voice(he was in the Air Force for 15 years) and they all listen to him. He tells jokes,makes them laugh, but then says- no loud noise in my house- and they all listen. We are slowly doing renovations on parts of our house. When we were putting new flooring in our kitchen- I had 2- 3 year old boys who had to sit at the door and watch Ray. These boys were fidgets- but would sit like statues watching him do the work. Worked for half an hour, until he got tired of "what you doing now Ray" and "how come?" for the gazillionth time.

    Lots of times if he comes home early he hides in our bedroom and then says to me= are they all gone now?
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